Get Help

I have been playing golf my entire life. One might think that because of my lifelong pursuit of the game, I have some actual notable talent or skill - but you would be generally incorrect. I am not here to whine about my golf game - my family gets enough of that. Plus, I like the way that I play and I normally have fun whenever I get a chance to head out to the links. But that has not always been the case. And it won’t always be the case in the future either. I suffer from an affliction that most golfers suffer from: Pride.

Pride. That terrible, foolish thing that can bring down most people. It’s what has plagued my golf game for years. It has plagued a lot more than that too. When I was in high school, I pursued golf competitively. I played for the high school team and I wanted to be as good as I possibly could. I had posters of the Havemeyer Trophy (awarded to the top amateur in the US every year) hanging in my room as inspiration. I had high hopes. And so, I poured myself into my game. I practiced like mad. I played like mad. I got a job digging literal ditches to help pay for all of the golf tournaments I played in to improve my game. I played nearly 60 hours of golf per week. I was what you would call a “range rat”. I was going to will myself into becoming a great golfer.

And it worked.

Right up until it didn’t.

I got much better at golf the Summer prior to my senior year. My handicap started floating around the low single digits. I had some impressive finishes at high school tournaments. And my game was looking good. And then, I just lost it. Right before senior year tryouts, my swing left me and my game evaporated. I still made the varsity squad, but mostly out of pity.

I was devastated and confused. How could something I wanted so badly and worked so hard for just not work out for me? Sure I had failed in the past, plenty of times, but never like this. There was a cloud that then followed me around, reminding me that sometimes you just fail. And for a while I thought that was the lesson - that you can’t always get what you want, no matter how hard you try.

And that’s an okay lesson. But it’s also not the whole truth. Because the thing I didn’t realize was that in the midst of all of those hours of practice, all of that time wanting to be great, I didn’t spend any time finding someone else to help me become great. I had taken a lot of lessons growing up. I thought I knew it all about the golf swing and course strategy. Like most 17 year olds, I was full of confidence and optimism. And like most golfers, I was chock-full of pride. I could do it myself because all I needed was myself to get there.

But that was wildly wrong. My game fell apart because all of those hours at the range helped me create bad habits that I didn’t recognize on my own. I had no one to show me the warning signs of my game’s impending collapse. I was adrift, all by myself, because I had turned down a seat on a bigger boat earlier in my voyage. I could have taken lessons and I could have found people to coach my game along. But I didn’t because I didn’t think I needed their help.

It took me a long time to realize it, but that’s the reality. If you want to make anything happen, you need to get help. This isn’t just about pursuing childhood dreams either. It’s much more than that. It’s about any time you want to accomplish something. Or change something, Or improve yourself in some way. Or further your business.

It’s especially hard for high-achieving folks to admit that they need help. But that’s just how it works. Anybody who has ever achieved anything in their life has had help along the way. Sometimes they know and sometimes they don’t. I would rather be the person seeking out the help, then getting lucky and waiting for the right moment.

This might sound like obvious, dumb advice. But in times like these, it sometimes helps to remember the basics. So whoever you are, Get Help. You’ll be glad you did.